Sometimes I want to...

cry or scream for an answer. I want to hear the voice of God everyday. I know that God is greater than all my worries and problems. I know that as I begin to fight the spiritual battle that I will face opponents. I need clarity God. I thank you that I cannot rely on my own strength to do things, but it is through your power and through my faith in you that I can do all things. It is so hard to wait and be hit and threatened by the enemy, while I have to remain silent and wait. Thank you that if you God are for me, no one can be against me. I love you and even though it hurts to wait, I will do it and pray for you to clarify things to me as they come.

God is good

God is good, all the time. It feels like I have overcome a spiritual battle although if God were to grade me maybe I would get a 7 out of 10 for really holding fast onto loving God and trusting Him. I failed to trust Him at times fully and took things in my own hands...sorry God. I am so happy that God forgives and restores. Amen! He restores us when we make mistakes and He even restores the joy of our salvation. GOD you are good. The greatest pursuit in life is to know God and to make HIM known (Jack Graham).

I know that I need to know you more God in everything I do. I need to know you more intimately. I need to experience you more intimately. Please let me feel your constant love and help me to understand who you are as much as my limited mind will allow me to accept.

Thank you God

Thank you that you have begun to speak to me, or maybe I just started to actually listen and get rid of the distractions that have been taking my attention off of you. You have been teaching me more about what your love looks like, forgiveness and helping others grow closer to you and love you. I am sorry for the times I held a grudge and for the pride I held on and for the times I failed to forgive others. I forgive them now and I thank you that it is through your power alone that I can forgive. God you are so good to me. I thank you for revealing to me even more clearer than ever that in this life we are fighting a spiritual battle, which can only be fought with spiritual devices (prayer,etc). I am so thankful that you have marked this in my mind. I am so sorry for trying to rely on my own efforts and my flesh and blood to fight a spiritual battle. The souls of people are at stake and if they die without knowing your Son Jesus and accepting Him and the fact that He died for our sins so that we have might forgiveness, then they will rely on their own goodness to be reconciled with You, but that's not enough. I have purposed to not listen to any of the lies that I have believed so long, the thoughts that question my ability to lead people to Jesus or to plant in a seed in their life. I am so determined now whenever I have a thought that discourages me from sharing the Gospel to rebuke that idea, understanding that I do not fight against flesh and blood, but against Spirit. I am ready to live totally for you and work for you everyday until I take my final breath. Thank you!!!

Dear God I want to hear from you

God, I want to hear from you. Why aren't you speaking? Speak for your servant listens. I learned this week that I can't begin to love others truly the way You love me until I know what it means to be deeply in love with You. I love you, but I know that I have put other things before you in the past. Please forgive me. Change my heart attitude, 24 hours I want to desperately be seeking after you, in my thoughts, words, actions. I love you, but I want to know what it means to give everything up and to rely only on you, to be madly in love with you. I know that in order to do this I must first ask you for forgiveness for living in my own strength and trying to do things in my own strength, especially love others. I need to put off any things that are not of you: selfish attitudes, self righteousness and see myself just as a sinner, my true nature, a sinner saved by grace. Thank you God. I know you have good things in store for those who love you and I want every second to be a working minute for me, towards your kingdom. I thank you that you are helping me reveal more about myself and to feel comfortable with myself just as I am, comfortable with the fact that you love me and that's enough. I want to love others who know no love. Destroy any judgmental thoughts and attitudes as soon as they try to take place in my heart or mind. It is not of you...only love. This week I will practice

My last breath

It has been awhile. However, I just noticed that every time I come to blog I appear to be in a solemn mood, a bit uncertain of a situation. I have been thinking lately about my relationship with God. I know that I want to be fully in love with You to the point where I can't get you off of my mind even if I try. I promise I just want to put you first in everything and I won't get sidetracked any longer. For my life is but a vapor a breath and before my last breath passes I want to glorify and honor you in everything I do. I love you.